I heard this song repeatedly on the radio (not by choice) and was flabbergasted to learn a few things. 1) This song was not sung by Miley Cyrus, but rather a 15 year-old boy. 2) I, apparently, developed way slower than normal in the “love-emotions” department. 3) I am becoming old.
This is ridiculous. First of all, I love the way the video begins — where Usher calls this little boy who is presumably house-sitting for him, or just hanging out while Usher was out doing whatever an Usher does. Then, he throws a ragin’ party full of grade-schoolers that looks so ridiculously innocent that I was waiting for a shot of his mom paying the Domino’s delivery guy and gesturing to pour that Pepsi over the sink.
He also points a lot at the camera. I barely had any functional control over my limbs at that age to sway and point the way he does. (Something that made Mr. Smith’s uninspired and rhythm-less choreography in our school musicals easy-breezy for me.)
Secondly, this Canadian child sings a song about this ‘shawty’ of his being his one love/one heart/one life, and that her fight is his fight and her breath is his breath. And that many of these girls called but she is the chosen one.
At 15, I wouldn’t have even been able to comprehend any of those things, let alone write a song about it. And ‘many’ certainly never called me, mainly because my dad was always “surfing the web” on our AOL dial up.
Subjects/titles of songs I would have written at that age:
1. Hooray! I’ve Been Cast in ‘Our Town’!
2. How M I Getting So Fat?
3. Y R They Callin’ Me Gay? (Oh..)
4. Learners Permit, Learners Permit!
5. Do them Morning Announcements!
6. Shoulda Worn Deodorant (Stupid, Stupid, Stupid)
7. Sweat Pants w/ Dress Shoes.
8. But I H8 Church! (feat. Furious Mom)
9. Oh Man, If I was Matt Halbeisen…
10. New Jeans = New Boner.
Well you get the idea. The point is, did I miss out? Did anyone else throw parties and have their respective shorty? Has that word been around since 1999? Is this what kids think like nowadays?
I promise to never bring him up again.
